Only Children Syndromes: Fact or Fiction

This is my beautiful daughter who grow up an only child.  When I was raising her, I heard many women say that they would never have one child because they wouldn’t want them growing up alone or only children are spoiled and misbehaved.   My daughter turned out just fine.  She had playmates, she listened and she followed rules.  Now I must admit, I spoiled her rotten and I enjoyed every second of it.  Yes, she had more
than most children because she was an only child, but that’s not my problem.  I told parents who were bold enough to make comments that maybe they should have stopped at one too.  


She find herself a target by other kids at school at times.  When we got to the bottom of the harassment, we found that the child or children where envious of  her clothes, other possessions, and accomplishments.  She was called Little Princess by some of her classmates and if you can believe it by some adults.  Those with siblings seemed to be the ones who were green with envy.  I’m not saying that all children who had siblings were a problem, but I am saying that the children she had issues with had siblings.   Funny, she was suppose to be the one who ended up with problems.   

During that time, I often wondered why people believed that only children would be unhappy, selfish, spoiled, lonely and maladjusted.  The Only Children that I knew did not fall into any of these categories.  I’ve also wondered how America explained the behavior of children who misbehaved and who had siblings.  Most importantly, when our children end up with drug and alcohol problems or behind bars, does it really matter that they were Only Children, the Baby, the Middle Child or the Older Brother or Sister?

I did some research on Only Children and I’m happy to say that this article in  Psychology Today discusses some issues that parents encounter raising only children, however, the majority of only children turn out to be happy, well-adjusted adults.  It has also been proven that children with siblings often have self-esteem problems because they grow up thinking their siblings were favored or they were neglected because mom and dad had to divide their time, attention and money.  Oh lets not forget the middle child syndrome and the arguments and hatred spewed between siblings.  Psychologist have found that it can take a lifetime to work out problems created because children grew up believing they were treated unfairly by their parents or siblings.  In some situations they don’t speak for years if ever again over childhood issues that were never resolved.  

My daughter has stated that there were times she wished she had a sibling, but for the most part she was content with her upbringing.  She had my undivided attention, everything she needed, and the majority of the time she got everything she wanted.  By the age of 21, she had traveled to places that most people won’t see in a their lifetime.  I had no behavior problems with her growing up.  She did not hit, spit or bit other children nor did she disrespect any adults.  She excelled in school and had plenty of cousins and friends to play with.  To this day, she’s very sociable and respectful.    

For mothers who only have 1 child, don’t allow the myths of the “Only Child Syndrome” make you feel guilty about your decision. Personally, I believe people should have as many children as they want and can afford.  None of us know how our children are going to turn out.  Whether we have 1 child or 10, we just do the best that we can raising them.  I survived motherhood one day at a time, and it is still my motto.  


Do you have 1 child?  Did you grow up an only child?  I would love to hear your take on this issue.  Please leave us a comment. 

Cabbage and Sausage Recipe


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cabbage recipes

I love cabbage.  If you’re a fan, here’s a recipe that you must try.  Did you know that cabbage is great for your health?  It’s actually considered to be one of the best health foods.

Besides being delicious, here a few reasons to try this recipe:  

  • Cabbage contains the least fat and the fewest calories of any vegetable
  • It helps lower cholesterol
  • It’s loaded with Vitamin C
  • It’s a great natural source of fiber
  • It’s a great source of antioxidants  
  • It’s expensive to eat 

 Now that we have the health benefits down.  Here’s the recipe: 

  • 1 stick butter or margarine
  • 1 small head of cabbage, chopped
  • 1 small onion, chopped
  • 1 pound polish sausage, sliced into round pieces (I use smoked sausage)
  • 1 (15 ounce) can diced tomatoes  (Pull out a quart of your canned home grown tomatoes and chop) 
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 1/2 teaspoon pepper
  • 1/4 of chopped green pepper
  • few drops of hot sauce (optional)
  • chopped garlic clove (optional)
Melt butter in large skillet. Add cabbage, onion, and green pepper and cook on medium high for about 5 minutes stirring to keep from sticking to pan. Add remaining ingredients, cover and simmer for 20 – 25 minutes.  Season to taste. 
Note:  I brown my sausage in the oven and have it ready to add to the simmering ingredients.  I found the recipe rather bland, so I added garlic.  Serve with diner rolls and apple sauce.   Makes about 8 servings.

Look Who’s Six – Happy Birthday

Hard to believe my baby boy turned six this week-end.  We spent the week-end celebrating his 6th birthday.  Yep, the top picture is from three years ago.  He is going up fast.  I’m amazed how his likes have changed as well.  No more Nick Jr. unless he’s watching cartoons with his baby sister.  He’s turned to Disney where they have real people,  as real as it gets on TV anyway.  No more dinosaur figures, hot wheels or toy soldiers.  He has iPad, X-Box and Kindle
Fire to play computer games and learning activities and a new four wheeler for outside fun.  You can find either a football or basketball in his hands.  We received a new bike for his birthday.  One without training wheels at that. 

His taste in clothes has changed as well.  No more Elmo, Handy Manny, or Cars tees.  He’s into Nike, Addias and Puma.  He now wears boxers, Jordan tennis shoes and his favorite sports team hats.  He’s playing flag football and basketball.  Where does time go?  

There was a part of me that was happy to be celebrating his 6th birthday, but a sadness too because I know it’s just a matter of time before his interest change even more.  Thankfully he still loves to snuggle with Mawmaw and thinks girls are yucky!  I have a few years left before he asks for the car keys and heads out on a date. 

How Do You Choose Grandparent Names

Did your children decide on their grandparent’s name or did your parents make the decision on what they wanted to be called?  My grandson ultimately made the decision for me.  I had initially selected the name Gran, but it didn’t stick. 

I was visiting my grandson one week-end, and when I walked into the house he said Mawmaw.  Where’s Gaga (referring to his grandfather)?  At that moment, Gran went out the window.   I must admit, I was surprised he called me Mawmaw.  I’ve often wondered how he came up with those names for us.  Especially, since I had been calling myself Gran for almost 2 years.  His grandfather had been calling himself granddaddy.  Isn’t it amazing how things can change in a split second. 

Now, I must admit that I wasn’t exactly thrilled with the name Mawmaw.  I didn’t think it was a fit for me and it sounded so old fashion.  I felt somewhat disappointed.  Afterall, I’m not your typical grandma.  I’m a high heel wearing diva who’s into blogging, texting, social media, and a need for wine.  I just wasn’t feeling Mawmaw.  I chose the name Gran because I didn’t want to end up with an old fashion out of date name.  Gran was traditional, but still had a sophisticated ring to it.  My daughter stated, “Mom you have to be whatever he calls you”.  I wasn’t sure if I was disappointed because I had spent 9 months selecting a name and it was suddenly gone or because the name sounded so country and out of date.  The only other person that I knew as Mawmaw was my 60 year old Aunt.   My grandson had thrown a wrench into the plans.  My siblings had chosen their names, and I wanted that opportunity too.     

Our grandchildren use a variety of names for us.  In my family there’s Poppy, Nana, Granny, and Granddaddy.  As I was discussing the name change with co-workers, I was surprised to find out that many of their grandchildren called them MawMaw.  It was actually a popular name.  Who knew!

As I continued to think about it, it suddenly didn’t matter what he  called me as long as he called my name.  My grandson had changed my life forever.  I looked at the change totally different.  What’s in a name?  I realized that my grandson had a mind of his own, and he was demonstrating his personality, his individuality, and how he felt about me.  I was a Mawmaw, and he believed it was a fit for me.  He didn’t see me as a diva, texter, blogger or wine taster.  I was simply his Mawmaw.  He has made it clear over the course of the years with his cousins, that’s my Mawmaw.  I have happily accepted the nomination.  I’ve held that title for 5 years, and I’m proud to wear it.  I now have a grandson and granddaughter.  I will continue to strive to be the #1 Mawmaw, because that is what is truly important. 

What do your grandchildren call you or your parents?  Leave us a comment, we would love to know.  

Look Who’s 1

Wow, it’s been a long time since I posted.  I took a much needed break to focus on my grandchildren, rest and just figure out where I was headed in my life.  I ended a long term relationship, got tired of being in it by myself.  I did a few home improvements, planned and hosted the grandchildren’s birthday parties, planned and hosted my little Zarriah’s Christening party, planted a garden and harvested and canned my crop, vacationed in St. Croix and the list goes on.  I’m feeling energized and have lots of posts for you so lets get on with it. 

Look who turned 1 August 28.  My little preemie, Zarriah, who weighed 2lbs 10 ozs. when she entered this world is thriving.  Miss Muffin is weighing in at 20 plus pounds as you can see.  She’s not walking yet, but she’s crawling, pulling herself up and taking steps while holding on.  She has become quite a handful.  She’s no longer on formula and we’ve moved to stage 3 foods. The doctor said her eye sight is fine and they don’t foresee any vision problems in the future.  She’s had an ear infection, but other than that she’s a picture of health. 

We decided to celebrate big for her 1st birthday.  We felt so blessed that she had survived and was doing so well, we wanted a big birthday bash for her with family and friends.  Celebrate we did. Stay tuned for pictures and all the happenings with the children and my journey as a 50 plus single mother.   It’s so good to back. 

Beyonce Uses Harness For Blue Ivy

Looks like Blue Ivy is about to loose a slipper.  Aren’t they adorable.  Beyonce takes advantage of the beautiful weather we’re having on the east coast and strolls with her bundle of joy in New York.   Blue Ivy is becoming a big girl.  According to her grandfather, Matthew Knowles, she’s going to be tall.  Granddaddy said,   ‘You just want to love and kiss her, but the great thing with grandkids is that you can give them back.’

I agree with Matthew on that note.  You allow your grandchildren to get away with things th at you wouldn’t let your children get way with.  Extra treats, sweets, late nights with the TV and the list goes on.   Blue Ivy is the second grandchild for Matthew and his ex-wife Tina Knowles who divorced him after 31 years of marriage.  He has a grandson, Daniel “Julez” Smith, by his daughter Solange Knowles.  Thanks to the Daily Mail for the picture of mother and daughter. 

Blue Ivy

Beyonce has finally decided to take her precious daughter, Blue Ivy Carter, out and about.  She is strolling about New York City with Blue Ivy in a leopard print Baby Bjorn wrap.  

The second picture is Beyonce leaving the restaurant where she and Blue Ivy had lunch with daddy, Jay-Z,  at the Italian eatery Ristorante Sant Ambroeus in the West Village.

Jay-Z and Beyonce own a large portion of this Tribeca, lower Manhattan, apartment building including a Penthouse.  It is rumored that they added a 2,200 square foot nursery for Blue Ivy and her nanny.    

Check out Beyonce’s release of other pictures of her and Blue Ivy here.  Be sure to subscribe to Mother 2 Mother on the left so you don’t miss give aways and other great posts.  You can also connect with me on other Social Media sites in the upper right corner. 

I’ll Get You – Daughter Posts Video of Family Law Judge Beating Her

Oh modern technology!  You gotta love it.  This beautiful young lady decided to video her father who is a Family Law judge beating her with a belt and posted it on Youtube.  When I watched it, I was stunned to say the least.  It was hard to believe that anyone in this day and age would be using corporeal punishment on their child, especially a family law judge.  What made it worst was the fact that her mother was in on it. 

This young lady has cerebral palsy, which just makes me cringe.  She was caught downloading music to her computer.  Hello, that’s what teens do.  I disciplined my daughter a hundred times when she was a teen for downloading music and virusus on the computer.  Did I resort to beating her, no. 

During the beating with a leather belt, the judge said that he was going to beat her into submission.  Her mother told her to lay on her stomach and take it like a woman.  How sick is this?  The young lady was 16 years old.  Not only that, we as woman are suppose to allow some man to beat our ass.  I don’t think so. This is what you want to teach your daughter?

This brilliant young lady understood abuse, and knew that her father needed help.  She also understood that abuse gets worst not better.  She hold on to the video for 7 years, and finally decided to post it last week so the public could get a glimpse of who he really was.  Why, because she said her father was now harassing her.  The judge when questioned about beating his daughter, stated that it wasn’t as bad as it looked.  He also said that he had apologized.  The mother apologized to her daughter years ago, and left the marriage.  I wonder whay?

I’m happy to say that Judge William Adams is being investigated.  I can’t image this man making a decision about anyone’s life after seeing the video.  As of yet he hasn’t been removed from the bench, but it has been decided that a visiting judge should hear his cases until the investigation has been completed. 

I applaud this young lady for having the courage to expose her abusive father.  She now regrets posting the video, but believes that he needs help and exposing him was the best way of pushing him into some kind of therapy.  Applause!  Applause! 

Pull Up Your Pants!


Teen Fashion

Should Parents Be Blamed for Their Obese Child

I heard an interesting question on CNN, and I’ve really been pondering the answer.  The question – Should obese children be removed from the home?  I’ve taken time to really think about the question.  Is the obesity due to a medical problem?   If it is a medical problem no, if it’s because the child is being allowed to eat and eat and eat, maybe.  Good eating habits have to be taught, and of course that is our responsibility as parents.   The American Medical Association believes it is the ethical thing to do.  They believe the child should be removed from the home and taught the proper eating habits and the importance of getting physical activity.  Once this is accomplished, the parents and child can be reunited.  Do you agree?  Why can’t the child remain in the home and they be taught healthy eating as a family?

Because children spend so much time on the computer or playing computer games, they rarely get physical activity these days.  The lack of physical activity along with unhealthy meals has lead to severe obesity in this country.  There are approximately 2 million obese children in the United States.  This is a serious problem wouldn’t you say?  I can count on 1 hand the number of times that I’ve seen kids in my neighborhood out riding a bike or walking.  Do we hold parents accountable and remove the children from the home?  I’ve seen children so obese, doctors have told parents that they are literally killing their child.

Parents complain that they can’t afford the healthier foods.  It’s cheaper to buy soda and other junk than all natural juice,  veggies and better cuts of meat.  I decided to plant a garden this year.  I will be canning fresh veggies and tomatoes for sauces, salsa, soups and chili.  Great meals that can be heated quickly by a child.  Not everyone has room for a garden, but there is container gardening that can be done on a patio or balcony.  The prices in the grocery store are ridiculous and the vegetables taste like cardboard.  I don’t blame the kids for not eating them.  I can barely get them down.  There’s a million recipes for chicken, which is the one meat that is not that expensive and considered healthy.   

I’m not sure about removing the child from the home, but I am sure that we have a child obesity problem in this country and it is leading to high blood pressure, diabetics, and other health problems.  Do you promote healthy eating and physical activity in your home?