Archives for October 2014

Furthermore, it’s anti-social behavior.  For example, school bullies usually come from families who lack warmth and affection or abusive homes. They are usually poor students and aggressive.  However, this is not always the rule.  A new bred of bullies have emerged.  They are referred to as “brat bullies or cyber bullies“.  These bullies are usually seen as spoiled, and they believe the world revolves around them.

Most importantly, bullying isn’t gender specific.  Believe it or not, girls are just as capable as bullying as boys. They just use different tactics.  Additionally, boys usually resort to physical violence.  Where as girls inflict psychological pain.  For example they may resort to calling their victim names, starting rumors, gossiping, or excluding the victim from groups or parties.  Psychological abuse can be just as devastating as physical abuse.  Some of the effects of psychological abuse are eating disorders, ulcers, depression, and suicide.

Just as importantly,  nasty emails and text messages are a part of the brat bully’s psychological warfare.  So, bullies are not limited to children who come from poverty, low income, or broken homes.  As a matter of fact most suffer from low self-esteem.  They wear the latest fashions, and engage in the latest technological trends, but deep down they feel inadequate.  So know that middle class and well to do homes have bullies too.  They call their victims fat, ugly, poor, make fun of the victim’s family or their cloths. They send emails or post pictures of the victim on-line and start rumors about them.

So, pay attention. Most importantly, if your child’s behavior changes, grades go down or they have mood swings, they may be having problems with a bully.  Likewise, don’t ignore the signs or think that the problem will go away.  You must get to the bottom of the problem and deal with it head on.

Signs of bullying:

1. Afraid to walk or ride the bus to school
2. Feeling ill in the morning, and not wanting to go to school
3. Asking for extra money or starts to steal
4. Starts bullying siblings
5. Stops eating or starts eating excessively
6. Poor grades
7. Cloths torn or dirty
8. Starts stammering
9. Crying themselves to sleep at night
10. Crying before going to school
11. Attempts or mentions suicide
12. States that they hate themselves
13. Withdraws from activities that they previously enjoyed
14. Nightmares
15. Have conversations with your child on what’s happening in school, with friends etc.  You may be able to detect problems during the conversation

It’s imperative that you let your know that abuse from other people is unacceptable.  Be sure to notify school officials of your concerns.  Safeguard your child by taking proper action. Bullying affects a person’s self-esteem and leaves life long scars.

Additionally, if your child is a bully you must address the pain that your child is inflicting.  So, don’t think that it’s not a big deal or kids are being kids.  For this reason, it’s imperative that you understand that children are killing themselves as a result of the pain they are enduring.   Most importantly, ask if you’re setting a good example for your child?  Are you contributing to your child’s mistreatment of another person?  Bullying is a serious issue within our society.  I hope my insight on signs of bullying will help you to help your child.  We would love to hear from you about your child’s bully experiences.  Please leave us a comment.

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