One of the roles women find themselves in – is “Superwoman”.  She is a multitasking-maven and limits her abilities to express and regulate her emotions. As long as she is out there flying, she doesn’t have to feel. She is applauded for this, and thrives on the adrenaline. She is addicted to other people’s opinions. Being everyone’s “go-to” person is how she feels powerful. And this false power keeps distancing her from what’s underneath her bravado. She is disconnected from her own authentic self, having no capacity to be present and live in the moment. She needs to focus, trust others to be there for her, and hear that she is enough!

“Superwoman” needs a-ha moments to access her own wisdom and stand clearly on her values. Celebrating self-compassion and self-care ignites her to “find her voice”. As her passion and purpose become clear to her, the condemning committee in her head has no power and she needs no “Superwoman” bravado to sustain her. You are enough, just the way you are!

This is a post from DJ Segovia.  She commented on a quote that I posted from Cynthia Bailey, Other’s Opinion and forwarded this post to me. I thought it was so appropriate to the quote. So many of us worry about what others think, and they see other’s opinion more important than their own.  They’re willing to sacrifice their health, self-worth and a safe environment to please others. They don’t think they’re enough or will never be enough because someone convinced them that they are unworthy. They disguise themselves in a cover of false power by becoming Superwoman.  

It’s easy for today’s woman to fall into the Superwoman Syndrome.  We give each other advice on how to multitask to accomplish goals.  We offer our services to others, and become the go-to person. We take care of children, our husbands, our homes, help with homework, prepare meals, give baths, grocery shop, work outside the home and the list goes on. We’re readily available with our high tech phones and i-pads and at some point become social media influencers. Forget lists, we need graphs to keep up with everything that we have to do. Have I mentioned extended family. Yes, we make ourselves available to them too.  Sometimes adrenaline is what keeps us going because we have completely exhausted ourselves or in time we like the rush. It can evidently become an addiction if we’re not careful. 

Learning to say no or taking a break is an not option for the Superwoman. We believe that we can do it all and some how we manage to do just that.  One of the hardest things that I had to do was to say no and accept that I’m not Superwoman.  I also had to make it clear that I no longer wanted to be the go-to person who solves everybody’s problems. I notified people that they needed to become responsible and solve their own problems. I’ve learned to take breaks from social media and blogging.  My health was on the line.

I have to admit, I felt guilty initially.  As time went on, I felt relieved and what others thought of me no longer mattered. I was good enough the way I am, and I wasn’t living to please everybody else in this world. For those who thought differently they could kick rocks. Those who wanted to remain in my life eventually accepted my new attitude, and my new outlook on life. It was freeing! I encourage each of you to take an assessment of what you’re doing and why you’re doing it. If it’s for the wrong reasons, stop.      

DJ is a single parent and has twenty four years’experience as a life and leadership coach, working in Corporate America. In Corporate offices of Target and Quiznos, television stations KTLA and KNBC and was also CEO of her own mortgage banking firm.  She is also a published author, accomplished public speaker, and a volunteer mentor to female university Students in New York City, Newport Beach, California and Boulder, Colorado. She has a Bachelor’s of Business Administration from NYU and a Master’s Degree from Biola University.
You can follow DJ on Google+ for more of her educational posts.  

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