Would you join an on-line dating site? Dating sites are everywhere. There’s e-Harmony, Black People Meet, Christian Singles, Match.com, Single Parent Love and the list goes on. Lets face it, so many things have changed. Social media has changed the way we live our life. We meet friends on Facebook, Twitter and blogs. Why not a dating site. Balancing life as a single parent, maintaining a full time job, maintaining a home, getting the kids to soccer, football, or ballet leaves little time for a social life. It can actually leave you exhausted.
Single parents or non-parents are turning to on-line dating. Mainly singles who aren’t interested in going to bars or clubs or are finding it difficult to meet someone on their level are curling up with a glass of wine and their laptop and experimenting on-line. There are many who are shy or have been out of the dating scene for some time and they are unsure of how to connect to another person who feel comfortable in the confines of their home. There are many reasons singles are heading to on-line dating sites. There have been many successful connections. One of my co-workers met her now husband on line.
I decided to experiment with on-line dating. I’m past the bar and club scenes, I so decided WTH. When joining, you’re required to set-up a profile. Of course it helps to add a picture, an up to date picture. I followed the instructions and waited for the fun to begin. You’re billed monthly for your membership and can access the site whenever you choose. You can IM with other members and receive emails. If or when comfortable, you can exchange phone numbers or agree to meet for a date. I met several men, I’ll take you through my experience with each.
The first man who expressed interest lived in my town. We spent time getting to know each other on line, but I gave up on him after a week. Getting to know him was like pulling teeth. He revealed little about himself, and most of his conversation revolved around sex or sexual positions. Now I’m all for good sex, but not while I’m getting to know you the first week. Good-bye pervert!
Next, I met someone who seem promising. He lived about an hour away and we had great conversations via the phone for about a month. We agreed to meet. When I arrived it was clear that he had been drinking, I could smell the alcohol when we shook hands. This wasn’t someone who had a few at the bar waiting for my arrival. I think he soaked in it the night before. Did I mention he showed up at our meeting with 2 golf buddies. Two immediate turn offs for me. At this point in my life, I’m not interested in a grown man who still sucks the bottle. Secondly, if you’re not man enough to go out on a date without a chaperon, you’re not man enough to be with me. I left and stopped accepting his calls.
The third and last man that I met on-line I actually thought there was potential. The first date went well, and there was a physical attraction. He actually excited me, and got the juices flowing. He seemed to have himself together financially, he had helped to raise his 3 daughters, had a beautiful home, and attended church regularly. We had many things in common. We both loved wine tastings, antiques, dining out and traveling. As time went on, he began to show his true colors. None of which I liked. He couldn’t make a commitment if his life depended on it. He lied, asked me for thousands of dollars and became angry when I said no. I couldn’t believe this fool thought he was that good or I was so stupid or desperate that I would give him my hard earned money. His love was conditional, if you let me get into your pants pockets, I’ll love you. He was pathetic. He even lied about his age. Now when you lie about your age, you will lie about anything. I asked him if he saw stupid tattooed across my forehead or if there was a sign in my yard that said Bank of Rhonda.
My first red flag was the lying. He couldn’t keep his stories straight. The second red flag was the fact that his children rarely visited. Their flights would have taken 2 hours and he lived 20 minutes from the airport. They didn’t show up for his birthday, Thanksgiving or Christmas. Not even a visit during the summer. When a man who you’re not married to or living with asks you for thousands of dollars. Run as fast as you can. Needless to say this went nowhere fast.
After 3 strikes, I cancelled my membership. For you ladies who are interested in on-line dating, don’t let my negative experience discourage you. There are many ladies who have been successful. I just didn’t have the endurance to continue meeting losers on-line. I am thankful to say that I have met someone and not on-line. I was introduced by a family member and it’s going great.
As a single mother, I wanted to share my on-line experience with my readers. Not to discourage you, but to let everyone know that modern technology doesn’t always work. Sometimes the good old fashioned way is the answer. Have you tried on-line dating? Let us know your experience or how you feel about the subject. We would love to hear from.