childhood development Archives - Mother 2 Mother Blog

Tips for Teaching Children to be Assertive

March 18, 2019 by Rhonda Gales Leave a Comment

Parenting is a monumental job. It requires teaching our children to be assertive, how to deal with their emotions, and dealing with positive and negative feelings. Even when they don’t know what they’re feeling or why. This parenting skill requires communication skills, empathy, and understanding. Remember your childhood and teen years. Today, we’re giving you a few parenting tips on teaching children to be assertive.

Teaching your kids to be assertive

Children are not the best at articulating their thoughts and feelings. Furthermore, they lack the experience in articulating many aspects of their human experience. The responsibility of teaching children to be articulate, honest and respectful is a major responsibility. While we want our children to express themselves, and ask questions like an HST lawyer, they don’t always have the skills.

We must remember, teaching children to be assertive is vital to them being able to create boundaries. Furthermore, it helps them improve their self-esteem and confidence. As adults, we have seen the issues that come with not being assertive. It can range from saying yes to things we don’t want to do to being burned out because we can’t say no. To avoid creating a similar future for your child, teach them assertiveness early. They will know to stand up for themselves in an amicable manner and thus develop stronger relationships.

Helping children navigate their emotions

The initial stages of teaching a child to be assertive can be difficult. Children will follow your example. If you have issues with assertiveness, now would be an excellent time to practice what you will be preaching. For example, if you always clean up after dinner make it clear that others must help. You will likely be emotionally charged, but remember to remain calm as your children will be watching and listening.

As you master assertiveness in your life, encourage your children to do the same. Temperament plays a role in how your child conveys their message. Those with stronger personalities can come across as aggressive. If so, gently point it out to your child how others may perceive them. Remind them that the point of getting their message across is to create understanding. It is not to offend others. It is vital that they learn to respect others even while disagreeing.

Your child might initially have a hard time because they are still learning about their emotions and how to communicate them. Be patient and ask them to extend the same for themselves. Teaching assertiveness creates an opportunity to have conversations about the importance of self-awareness and boundaries. Additionally, you can discuss what they can do when someone is unkind or dismissive after they assert themselves. Equally, praise them for the times they are confident and encourage them to express their feelings too.

Remaining positive through the teaching process

No parent gets everything right, so remember that it takes practice. When you feel the message is not getting home take a different tactic. Most importantly, remember there are factors we have to contend with that are out of our control, including their social circles. Be diligent, and do your best.

Filed Under: Character Building, Parenting Tips Tagged With: childhood development, Kids, parenting tips, teaching children character

Caring For Kids In The Twenty First Century

April 5, 2017 by Rhonda Gales Leave a Comment

Children really are a blessing. They are joyous and completely change your life with their energy, enthusiasm and wide-eyed wonder. They also produce some of the most terrifying moments of your life. Caring for kids can be overwhelming at times. It only takes them wandering away from you in a supermarket just once for you to never want to let go of their hand again. One second they are there, and you turn away for just a moment, and they manage to completely disappear. When you eventually find them you want to hug them and shout at them at the same time. It is not really their fault. They, thankfully, do not realize what the potential dangers might be.

Another sometimes stressful thing about children is when they are unwell. All you want for a child when it is born, and for the rest of their life, is for them to be healthy and happy. The reality of life is that no one is always, at every moment, healthy and happy. Children are no different. There is reason to be optimistic though. We are living in the best possible time in history for healthcare. Scientists learn more and more everyday about how to help this ailment or solve that one and their understanding will only increase. Technology has played a great part in this too. Kids, as they grow and change, will have all sorts of things that go a bit askew. Fortunately, there are also ways to help them. Here are few to be aware of:

Running a Fever

Perhaps the most common, and for many parents, the most alarming problem is a child with a high temperature. It causes such concern because everybody knows that it is a sign that something is wrong somewhere. A high temperature is never good, but there are ways to bring it down without a trip to the doctor or hospital. You can purchase over the counter medicine, a cool damp washcloth on the forehead, popsicles, ice cream or a few ideas. If the temperature remains at 104 degrees or higher consult your pediatrician immediately. The fact remains, it is difficult seeing them in pain, especially since they themselves do not understand it.

Developmental Progress

Aside from infrequent illnesses like fevers, another pressing concern while caring for kids is a child’s developmental progress. Autism is in the news a lot because of claims that certain vaccines may have caused it in some children. However, an issue that gets less attention is speech development. It can have a massive impact on a child’s entire life. Technology now allows children to get treatment with experts around the country through online calls. There are lots of helpful telepractice resources that you can read. Treat speech development problems early.

SIDS

On a particularly positive note, science has helped reduce SIDS deaths (or crib death as it is sometimes known) by half by encouraging parents to put their children to sleep on their backs. It is not understood why, but children who sleep on their back rather than their stomach are at a reduced risk.

While parents will never stop worrying, there is more reasons to be optimistic now than ever before. We hope that you found our tips on caring for kids beneficial.

Filed Under: Health, Parenting Tips Tagged With: childhood development, children's health, raising children

Are You Teaching Your Child About Racism

May 1, 2014 by Rhonda Gales

Do you see the world in black or white? If so you’re missing mesmerizing colors. I created this quote several months ago, and tucked it away. Today I pull it out. I’ve been watching the coverage on Donald Sterling, owner of the LA Clippers, and I’ve had so many things go through my mine. I debated whether I should do this post.

I wavered because I have diverse followers and I didn’t want to offend anyone with my thoughts and truths. However, there are times that we need to put on our big girl pants and face reality. I am known to give things to you straight and I don’t always offer a chaser. But lets not be afraid to discuss uncomfortable issues on Mother 2 Mother. After all, it’s Real Talk for Real Women.

As an African American, I’ve encountered my share of racism. At times blatant and others not so much. I was profoundly offended when I was listening to Donald Sterling’s words. It seems that some people’s focus was on his First Amendment rights and other’s focus was on his racist comments. When I was listening to his words, his First Amendment rights was not an issue for me. First Amendment rights don’t apply when a person is being disrespected. If you think you’re bold enough to speak it, you have to be bold enough to suffer the consequences of your words. I applauded the fact that he has been banned from the NBA for life. NBA= No Bigots Allowed.

Why should his First Amendments rights override another person’s rights to live, play, work and live freely in this country? Why should other people have to endure his bigoted comments? Because he has the right to say whatever he wants? Do we really? This is a prime case of be careful what you say.

Let me be clear, I’m not saying that a person is not entitled to their opinions. However, if your opinions are hurtful to another person maybe you should keep it to yourself. Do you believe people are born racist? Do you think racism is learned behavior? I was called the “N” Word for the first time around 11 or 12. Needless to say, the person who sprouted that word took an ass-whipping. Before I could respond, my sister gave her a whipping that she will never forget. I don’t condone violence, so as an adult I would handle things differently.

But at that point, we weren’t about to walk away without leaving her with a memory. I grow up in a small community, and we were free to roam and be carefree as children. We played together, we went to school together and some dated outside of their race. I am happy to say that most of us have remained friends and follow each other on Facebook. A few of us even worked for the same agency. To me that says a lot of what we truly thought of each other growing up. I’m proud of my upbringing.

Since I believe racism is taught, I made sure that I educated my daughter on the importance of loving everyone. I never limited her on who she could play with, socialize with or date unless I believed that person was harmful in some kind of manner. She had diverse friends growing up and she still has most of them. She dated outside of her race in high school.

We must educate our children to not discriminate against another person based on race, religion, sexual preference, gender etc. It may not be how we choose to live, but so be it. We must have this conversation with our children, so they will know better. They are the next generation and our future leaders.

You can think what you want; however, your offensive remarks could become public. Regardless of whether they were supposed to be private or not, there is a price to pay. It is imperative that each of us think before we speak, period. Being a hateful person is not natural. There’s a hole in your heart. On-line posts are no loner private. So, what you say in another’s presence may not remain private either. Lesson learned. Are you teaching your child about racism or turning the other cheek?

Filed Under: Parenting Tips Tagged With: childhood development, childhood diversity, racism

6 Free Chore Charts for Children

April 18, 2014 by Rhonda Gales

Do you give your children chores? First, I have found that many of our children today have become entitled. They think that they shouldn’t have to work for anything. Somehow the world owes them. They make no effort in school, and most importantly they have no respect for their parents or anyone else. Attitude is everything. Today, I’m sharing parenting tips on children’s chores for children.

Furthermore, children should learn that there are no entitlements. They must work for they what they want in life. Children need to understand that mom is not a maid or their personal chef. Putting a roof over their head and food on the table is the result of work. Just as important, many children grow up not knowing how to care for themselves or how to do things around the house. So, chores for children is a good thing.

Each of us should strive to become independent. Furthermore, we should each strive to make contributions in the world. Raising responsible children is a must for parents. It all starts at home. That thought process still continues in my home. It applies to my grandchildren today. Equally important, work ethics should be instilled early. There are many benefits to children being given chores. We suggest that you use our children’s chore charts below to track and reward their progress. Here are a few benefits for giving children chores:

Responsibility – So, teaching children to take care of the home and themselves should be taught early. This includes their room and their hygiene.
The Importance of Completing A Task – Next, children need to learn how to start a task and take it to completion. They will learn endurance, perseverance, and to do things over again if it’s not satisfactory. Using chore charts is a good way to help them remember and organize.
Team Work – Chores will teach children about working as a member of a team in the home. Seeing that each has a part will help them see how each contributes. It will demonstrate that each team member contributes to the success of a family and relationship.
Self Sufficiency – Also, children need to learn how to sustain themselves when possible. Getting a drink from the refrigerator can teach self sufficiency. Putting on their clothes, shoes etc. are good places to start.
How to Clean and Organize – Giving children the responsibility of helping with dishes, meals and cleanup teaches this lesson. It will give them a sense of keeping things tidy, and the satisfaction of keeping order.
The Importance of Money – Furthermore, children need to learn that things in the home cost money. This includes recreational items, clothes, games, toys etc. Allowing them to do chores to earn money is a great way to help with this lesson. Teach them to save for something they want. Allow them to experience the excitement of reaching their goals.
How to Save Money – Giving an allowance for assisting around the house is a great way to teach children to save money for something they would like to have or do down the road.
Receiving and Giving Rewards – Finally, children will learn that receiving and giving rewards boosts confidence and self-esteem.

Next, download our children’s chore charts shown above here. Children’s chore charts are a great way to help your children remember and complete their daily chores. Use gold stars as a reward. Place the gold stars on the days chores were completed. Most importantly, praise your children generously. Praise can be more of an award than the gold stars and money. You may also like Chores for Children by Age.