women's self help Archives - Mother 2 Mother Blog

How to Find Balance in Your Life When You Become a Mother

January 27, 2019 by Rhonda Gales Leave a Comment

Motherhood comes with a myriad of emotions and expectations. Society pressures women to become fantastic mothers. However, there are effects that most of us do not anticipate. As a result, you may wonder how to find balance in your life once you become a mother.

The role “mother” or even “wife” causes us to overshadow other aspects of our womanhood. If you feel you have lost yourself and can only talk about yourself as either a mother or wife, it’s time to step back and start empowering yourself again. Assess how you got there, and than figure out how to find balance in your life again.

It is all about the kids

Until children are able to take care of themselves, a mother is left to pour into their life constantly. Furthermore, they require nothing in return. This one-sided relationship can leave a mother with no energy for herself. There is a beauty in the selflessness of motherhood. However, just because you become a mother doesn’t mean you stop being a women or having needs, wants and desires.

If you feel you are missing something in your life, think about what changes you can make. That does not automatically mean diverting attention from your children. But, you can find pockets of time where you can be alone before the kids wake up. This may mean getting up a little early or making time for yourself while they’re in school or after bedtime. Most importantly, find something to do that you love. It could be pottery or volunteer work. Make it about you.

Your career was a big deal or still is

When you meet someone, after asking their name, what question do you ask next? If you ask what they do and they are a CRA tax audit Hamilton professional what feelings do you get? Society has conditioned us to place a high premium on what we do in life. When you become a mother, things change. When you are devoted to your children you can become bored and lonely. You may find that you are unable to relate unless you’re talking about your role as a mother and your children or husband.

However, it is vital to remember that your career is not what defines you. Just as you are not the total of who your children are. Challenge yourself to find commonalities that don’t make you feel awkward. Own who you are and wear it boldly. You aren’t here to impress others, just be the best you that you can be so you can find balance in your life.

Filed Under: Confidence, Empowerment Tagged With: confidence, self improvement, women's self help

How to Learn More About Yourself

October 1, 2018 by Rhonda Gales Leave a Comment

Learning more about yourself is always a good thing. It can enhance your career prospects or help you get insight into how you can be a better person. During your journey, you may end up unearthing a skill that you never knew existed. Most importantly, you may be able to use that ability to help your future. However, you must enter into the world of self-discovery in order to learn more about yourself and become self-empowered:

Push yourself out of your comfort zone

You’re never going to unearth any skills that you may have lying under the surface if you don’t find a way to bring them out. As a result, you have to start finding your way into alien territories and push yourself to enhance.

Quite simply, this means stepping out of your comfort zone and trying something new. This could mean doing taking on different tasks at work set to taking on new and exciting challenges with friends. For example, such as entering an Escape Room. An Escape Room is where you can play games and solve puzzles with others. Each room has its own storyline. You have 60 minutes to search for clues and solve the puzzles to earn your freedom and escape the room! It’s an opportunity to find make new friends and to do something different. Taking on new tasks allows you to offer your skills or assistance on a new project. Think about your knowledge and skill and put them to use. Doing so will help you learn more about yourself.

Adhere to your body clock

You may have been told from a young age that “the early bird catches the worm.” But, you don’t necessarily have to get up early in the morning in order to be successful. Everybody’s body clock is different. For some people, getting up later or even during the day is just more natural. So, if you feel like getting up early does nothing at all to help you to be proactive then try getting up a bit later.

Listen to your gut

Start listening to those gut feelings you get in certain situations. It’s your intuition raising red flags so you can assess what’s happening. Most of the time it’s a warning about something or someone. If something doesn’t sit right follow your instinct.

Finally, take heed and implement these steps into your life so you can learn more about yourself.

Filed Under: Confidence, Empowerment Tagged With: confidence boosters, self-esteem tips for mothers, women's self help

Why Am I Thankful For the Stumbles In My Life

November 12, 2017 by Rhonda Gales 2 Comments

Thanksgiving is upon us. This time of year I slow down and take inventory of everything that I’m thankful for and why I’m thankful. I strive to give thanks throughout the year, but I know that I don’t sing praises as often as I should. When I started to write my list this week, I found that I was thankful for my stumbles.

Most people would find stumbles a strange thing to be thankful for. The definition of stumble is to trip or momentarily lose one’s balance; to almost fall. There have been times when I’ve stumbled and was able to catch myself or regain my balance. Other times, I hit the dirt, floor or whatever was beneath me.

So, why am I thankful for the stumbles in my life. Because the stumbles have contributed to who I am and where I am today. Stumbling is a part of the journey in this thing called life. Those stumbles and failures caused me to have to get back up, brush myself off and try again. You can’t reach the finish line of life without stumbling along the way. When I look back on my stumbles, I think about my attempt to walk in high heels. When I first started wearing them, I had to practice walking in them. I practiced, and eventually I became a master. As a matter of fact, I can still wear them. They may not be 4 – 5 inches at this point in my life, but I can still rock 2 – 3 inch heels.

I can also relate my stumbles to learning how to walk. I don’t remember learning to walk, but I do remember my daughter. When she was first learning how to walk, she stumbled a lot. However, she reached a point where she figured out how to pull herself up and made another attempt at walking. She saw the goal, and she was determined to reach it. Sometimes the goal was a doll, a treat or me reaching out to her. She saw walking as a means to get from Point A to Point B.

As a result, she learned to hold on to the tables, chairs or sofa. Whatever she could grab to steady herself when she needed to, she took advantage of. If there was nothing available, she learned to stop in her tracks so she could steady herself before she proceeded. Eventually, she was able to reach her goals without losing her balance.

The same technique applies to life’s journey. Another reason I am thankful for my stumbles is because our walk through life requires us to stumble so we can grow. We become stronger in our purpose and learn along the way. It requires us to assess our goal, steady ourselves when we become unbalanced, or pick ourselves up when we hit the ground. Why am I thankful for my stumbles? Because they have helped me learn the following:

Endurance – Staying the course until I reached the goal.

Strength – I am thankful for never giving up, even when I thought I couldn’t go on. My stumbles strengthen me and have made me a stronger person.

Compassion – Being able to relate to other’s struggles and misfortunes because I have stumbled, has taught me compassion.

Empathy – Over the years I have learning to understand and relate to the feelings of others. When you stumble, there are tons of emotions that go along with the struggle. I learned that I wasn’t the only person who has stumbled or who is stumbling. As a result, you learn to listen and empathize with others.

Determination – Adopting an attitude of never giving up. Determination is needed to live, love and learn.

Knowledge – Learning from the stumble. Why, how I regained my balance, and how I reached my goal in spite of the stumble(s).

Appreciation – You learn to appreciate everything you have because of the stumbles and struggles. You learn to embrace them all, because they are a part of your story.

So, why am I thankful for my stumbles? Many of us are embarrassed or ashamed of what we have gone through in life. Because I am thankful for my stumbles, I no longer feel ashamed. I encourage you to also embrace your stumbles and struggles. They are a part of your story.

Ask yourself, why am I thankful for my stumbles? Make a list of them and be sure to give thinks for your journey. You can download the worksheet here. You may also like: 6 Tips to Boost Your Self-Esteem.