Parenting 101 Please

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If I read one more story about a child being abandoned, left in a hot car, neighborhood parks while mom is working or carjacked while mom is paying for gas I’m going to scream. I read these stories, and I’m in disbelieve.  It’s one after the other. People need a licence to have a dog, but anyone can be a parent. There’s no background checks, credit checks, education requirement, income requirement, we can just procreate. Many can’t afford to buy a box of pampers or can of milk for their child, but they have them and with no thought on how they’re going to take care of them. Providing a safe and productive life is an afterthought.   
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Finding Love Again



I’ve met a man that could potentially be my soul mate.  I may be falling in love again!  After my on-line dating fiasco, I had just about given up on love.  When it was the least of my concerns, I met a gentleman that has potential.  I met this gentleman through my Uncle, who had met him on his job.  For some reason, he believed that we would be perfect for each other. 

I was leery, but also intrigued.  My Uncle had never involved himself in my love life in any way.  I was curious as to why he believed this person was a match for me.  He also has tons of other nieces, I wondered why he chose me.  After chatting with him to get answers to these questions, he said he believed that we had many things in common and I should at least meet him.  I agreed to give up my cell phone number, and I would take it from there.  I received a call the next night, but I decided not to answer the my phone when the call came through.  

The gentleman left a message, and I must admit his voice captivated me.  I decided to wait until the next day to  return his call.  When I did he was unavailable, so I sent a text.  He responded immediately.  I soon learned that he was a weapons expert and was teaching a class.  We texted off and on for the next 2 hours.  We decided to exchange pictures, we both liked what we saw.  We talked on the phone and texted each other for the next two weeks.  We decided to meet and we’ve been inseparable ever since.  We’re hitting the seven month mark.  He believes that I’m the one, and he’s going to marry me.  We’ll see about that, but I’ve decided to enjoy the ride. 

He currently lives in the next state; however, he will be relocating to my area.  I learned that he has been teaching in my area and along the east coast for about a year, and plans to relocate to my town.  That was a plus.  We found out that we had many things in common.  He’s divorced and has 3 children and 1 grandchild, I have 1 child and 2 grandchildren.  We both love seafood, wine festivals, amateur photography, travel and the Lord

There’s a part of me that doesn’t want to get my hopes up because I’m afraid of another disappointment, but there’s another part of me that’s saying take the risk.  He may truly be the one.  Things have already gone better than what I encountered on the on-line dating sites.  He’s a romantic, holds my hand, opens the door for me,  pulls out my chair, he conducts himself like a perfect gentleman.  A man who has a job and is a gentlemen, nice start.  I was curious to see what was under the exterior. 

I felt that I needed to do thing differently in hopes that I would attract someone worthy of my time.  You may be wondering what I did.  I read Steve Harvey’s book Act Like A Lady Think Like A Man and decided to follow his rules.  I decided that I would not lower my standards.  If he wanted to be with me he would raise his if necessary.  I can’t say that he raised his, but he respected mine. 

Secondly, I didn’t let my emotions get the best of me.  I followed my head and stuck to my guns on becoming intimate too soon.  He pressed initially, but I held my ground.  I made it clear that I wanted to wait and get to know him and I wanted him to get to know me before we took that step.  Becoming sexually involved too soon clouds a woman’s judgment.   He backed off and actually said he respected my decision and he would wait until I was ready.  Ladies, if he respects you he will wait.  There’s times when we meet someone that we’re attracted to, and get involved too soon because we’re afraid they’ll go elsewhere.  My attitude was go, but you won’t be visiting candy land anytime soon. 

As we spent more time getting to know each other, I leaned that he has been divorced for 10 years, and has had time to heal.  No excess baggage and no baby’s mama drama!  He clearly stated that he has a 13 year old; however, he doesn’t allow her mother to interfere in his relationships.  Another plus.  He’s ready for a permanent relationship.  He also stated that if I wasn’t ready for a serious relationship he would accept that, but he would have to move on. During one of our conversation, he said there were three ingredients to a successful relationship, God, trust and respect and they must be in that order.  If any of the ingredients were missing, the relationship would fail.  Wow, he really got my attention there. 

Another thing that I really like about him is that we can talk for hours about nothing in particular.  We burned the phone lines for 4 hours one night and I think we hit the 1,334th text message in a three month period.  We’re still going strong.  Stay tuned for periodic updates on my journey to love. 

How did you meet your significant other/husband?  I’m always up for a good love story.   

                                                                           

I Got Played

Where you surprised when Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston announced their re-engagement?  I was.  I couldn’t for the life of me figure out why she would want to be with a man who betrayed her in so many ways.  Love makes us behave in strange ways. It makes us tolerate so much than what we would normally put up with.  I guess she was no exception.

I don’t think much of Sara Palin.  I still laugh at her running around the country promoting abstinence-only to teens, and she was unable to persuade her own daughter to abstain.  I don’t believe any parent wants their teenagers involved in any sexual activities, but lets get real it’s more likely than not they will engage.  So, why not have the talk and ensure they are protected if it should happen.   


I do commend her as parent for standing by her daughter, and ensuring that her daughter didn’t become a target by the media while she was on the campaign trail.  I also commend her for seeing Levi Johnston for the creep that he really is.  I can only imagine her grief as a parent when they announced their second engagement.  Unfortunately, as a parent you have to step aside at some point and let your children make their own decisions including mistakes.  You just hope that they don’t make too many mistakes or mistakes that they can’t recover from in the process.      
 
I remember my daughter dating a young man through high school that I did not like.  You don’t know how many times I prayed that she did not end up pregnant.  My prayers were answered, she finally realized that he was not good for her when she went away to college and moved on.  It was literally a mother’s nightmare.  
 
It’s hard to sit back and watch your child be hurt by someone that they love, and there’s nothing that you can do.  Hell it’s hard for adults to be hurt in their relationships by someone they love.  When it comes to your child, it creates an even deeper wound.  Being a mother is such a unique experience.  You want to protect your children forever.  I can truly say that giving birth and raising my daughter has been my most rewarding experience.  There isn’t much that I would change if I had to rewind the past 30 years with her.  I can’t say that I did everything right along my journey, but I tried.  
 
I felt so sorry when Bristol Palin said, “She Got Played”.   It’s tough when you want to believe in someone, but they don’t believe in themselves so you can’t.  Rumor has it Levi confessed to possibly having another baby’s momma.  Baby’s momma is saying he ain’t the baby’s daddy.  It seems Levi confessed to the possibility after they made the announcement that they were re-engaged.  He just couldn’t be honest upfront so she could make an intelligent decision before announcing to the world they were a couple again.  At that point, she saw him for the man that he really is and the man Sara Palin told her that he was, and called off the engagement.  I say, good for her.  She certainly can raise Tripp as a single mother.  I did, and I was around her age when I become a mother.   I’ll save that experience for another post.  Stay tuned. 
 
The sooner she lets go, the sooner she can move on.  I’m sure her parents will continue to stand by her and support her and the baby in every manner possible.  She will look back one day, and ask herself what she saw in that idiot and realize that she made the right decision by moving on.    
 
I would like to wish Bristol and Tripp all the best!