Inspirational Quote: Write Your Own Chapters

Like this quote?  Be sure to subscribe to Mother 2 Mother before you leave.  


You may also like this quote:  Learn to Listen

Inspirational Quote: Trust





Be sure to subscribe to Mother 2 Mother and follow me on Social Media before you leave. You may also like this quote:  My Destiny

Advice Quote: Know When To Let Go

Wisdom Quote: You Are Powerful

Inspirational Quotes: Do You Stand By Your Decisions

Happy Mother’s Day: A Feast For Queens

I had the best Mother’s Day ever!  How was yours?  We actually celebrated Saturday instead of today.  My daughter was home, so we decided to celebrate a day earlier since she has a 5 hour drive home today.

The weather was perfect and so was our time together.  We actually had 4 generations present, my mother was there to celebrate as well.  In this photo we have 3 generations, my granddaughter, my daughter and me.  Not my most flattering picture, the photographer didn’t say cheese, but how wonderful is that.  This was the first time that my daughter and I have spent Mother’s Day together in 6 years.  Since we have quite a distance between us and Mother’s Day falls on Sunday, she usually spends it at home with her family.  


My son-in-law decided that he would bring us together this year and all we would be required to do is sip Moscato, chat, play with the children and just relax. He would prepare a feast for the queens that we were.  The other men were suppose to assist him, but he ended up doing it all. My heart is still full.  My favorite food is seafood.  There were 3 different salads, Caesar, Pasta and Seafood.  He prepared to 2 different dishes of Salmon and in addition we had crab cakes and shrimp.  We worked from morning to evening preparing everything and it was delicious.  He set the table, which was beautiful and my 6 year old grandson blessed the food.  We believe in establishing faith early.  


We had a wonderful time and enjoyed every morsel.  The men allowed us to eat first and once we were about to explode, they took their places.  It was first class treatment all the way headed up by the best son in law in the world.  





This is a picture of my sister and mom who where also present.  The dinner was actually a tribute to the women in my daughter’s life who made her who she is today.  It was a wonderful experience, especially since my mom is getting up in years.  


It was also to let me know that she hadn’t forgotten my struggles as a single mother and that she understood that it takes a village to raise a child.  My sister played a major role in my daughter’s upbringing.  She made sure she was taken to school each day and kept her on some week-ends when I needed a break.  My mother stood by me during my struggle to empower, educate and rise above my situation as a single mother.  They made sure that my status as a single mother was simply that, it did not define who I was.  I can said that I had assistance, but my daughter was raised by me not other people.  Because you work outside the home, that doesn’t mean that other people are raising your children.  It’s as simple as setting up a schedule, getting organized and doing what you need to do as a mother.   

My daughter gave me a beautiful poem that basically stated not until she became a mother did she truly understand me and my determination to survive and give her a life better than mine.  In truth, my life wasn’t that bad.  She understands that I want her to do better than me, and the key to success is education and making sound decisions.  There is no room for excuses or blame for what happens in a person’s life after a certain age.  Being an adult means you take responsibility for your life and those in it.  She understands that we must work for everything in life, and when it is achieved it empowers.  I knew this week-end she understood my teachings and examples, and she would continue to stand on the foundation that I laid.  This was one of the best Mother’s Days ever, I am truly blessed.  

Lupita Nyong’o Redefining Beautiful

America has a new image of what is beautiful!  Yes, a dark skin African American woman is gracing the cover of People Magazine.  It’s quite refreshing for me as an African American woman to see Oscar Winner, Lupita Nyong’o taking her place among the likes of Julia Roberts , Cindy Crawford and Halle Berry.  I will always remember how beautiful she looked on the red carpet for the Golden Globes.  I thought the color of her dress against her skin color was breath taking.   (See Lupita in the bottom picture). 

Unfortunately,  women of color are rarely seen as beautiful. Like it or not, this is the truth.  Sure we’ve had Vanessa Williams and Halle Berry, but never a woman who is the color of milk chocolate and has natural hair, a wide nose and full lips.  I don’t purchase People Magazine, but I will purchase this particular issue.  I want my granddaughter to know that she can be seen as beautiful and not have blond hair, blue eyes and white skin.  Not that I don’t see women who have these attributes as beautiful, it’s important that our daughters have roles models in all colors, shapes and occupations too and we need to start promoting more of them.  After all this is America.  A melting pot of diverse people.   

 

Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder, but as an African American we struggle to find beauty within ourselves.  We never see it on television and we rarely see it in magazines or books.  I think Lupita summed it up nicely, she said she first equated beauty with what she saw on television too, “Light skin and long, flowing, straight hair,” She says. “Subconsciously you start to appreciate those things more than what you possess.”  Her statement couldn’t be more true.  It starts to affect your self-esteem and who you are.  You start thinking that you will never have those attributes, so you must be ugly, unlovable and the list goes on.  

I decided that I would work on  my granddaughter’s self-esteem early as I did with my daughter.  I told my daughter that she must constantly tell Zarriah that she is beautiful and praise her regularly.  She must grow up to be confident in herself just in case the world doesn’t see her that way.  If you’re not a woman of color, you may not be able to relate to this; however, it is an important issue for mothers and grandmothers of color who are raising daughters and granddaughters. 



I was elated when I found out Lupita will also be promoting Lancome Paris products.  I spend tons of money on Lancome as it is my make-up of choice, so it’s nice to see the Brand reaching out to a more diverse clientele.  We have a long way to go in this country in defining what is beautiful, but we’re off to a nice start.  

Photos courtesy of People Magazine

Inspirational Quotes: A Walk In My Shoes

Why You Should Listen to Your Instinct

 

Do you know the difference between intellect and instinct?  I hear you grumbling, who doesn’t know that right.  Our intellect
is information that we have gathered and retained over the course of years.  However, our instinct is what drives us to put that information to use. Bishop T.D. Jakes says “Your intellect tells you to load the gun, your instinct tells you to pull the trigger”.   Today we we’re going to discuss tips on empowering yourself.  Furthermore, those tips include why you should listen to your instinct.
Unfortunately, most of us ignore our instinct better known as  a “gut feeling”.   You know that funny feeling that you get about something or someone.  Sometimes our instinct tells us when something could possibly be wrong, but it also tells us when something could be right.  So many times we end up in bad relationships or miss out on opportunities because we ignored our gut feeling.  When we look back, we realize all the signs were there.  We stomp and get angry because we ignored what we saw or heard and tell ourselves over and over, I should have listed to my gut.
Our instinct could lead you to your passion or better yet your destiny.  At this point in my life, I’m not sure if I have arrived at my destiny, but I have arrived at quite a few of my passions.  Fortunately, I have arrived in a much calmer place and I’m able to see things clearer.  I arrived here because I learned to listen to my instinct and than connect to my intellect.  Once I connected to my intellect and instinct, I learned to sit still and think about what I’m feeling and why.  Know that you’re feeling some kind of way for a reason.  Think about what you may have seen or hear or if you’re happy, sad or
fearful.
Because I’m now in tune intellectually and emotionally, I have learned to remove myself from unhealthy relationships.  I have learned to say no, I need to take care of me and not feel guilty.  Here’s how I learned to empower myself:
1. I learned that what someone else is doing may not be my destiny.  I use my creativity and make things work for me in my way and style.

2. I thought about what I liked and what I wanted to do.  This helped me to develop a map and determine the roads that I needed to take to arrive at my passions.  I am still working on my destiny.

3. I started asking questions and answering them honestly.   This will help you decide what direction you should go in.  You may need to leave a relationship, company or situation and at the very least change some things in your life.

4.  If you’re not feeling good about your relationship, job or whatever you’re involved in you may need to reassess it.  Don’t second guess yourself, it’s your institution talking to you.  You should be happy or have a feeling of satisfaction about what you’re doing or involved in.  If not, why do it or stay in.

 

Is Your Child A Cyber Bully



Why aren’t more parents monitoring what their children are doing on-line?  The answer most parents give is because they are intimidated by the computer.  They lack computer skills, don’t have a smart phone and they really aren’t interested in learning how to use one.  As parents, we must be involved in what’s happening in our child’s life, especially in the age of modern technology.  From one mother to another, I think it’s imperative that we get involved in our children’s activities and stop thinking they’re doing the right thing and don’t need to be monitored.  

As parents we all want to think that we’ve raising angels and our children know right from wrong.  We’re shocked when we get a call to come into the school for inappropriate behavior from our child, when we receive a call from jail to bail them out or the cop knocks on the door to deliver bad news.  We all think that these things couldn’t possibly happen to us, these situations happen in other people’s homes.  So why should we concern ourselves.  How many times have you heard, my child would never do that!

I can give you a few reasons.  Did you hear about the Florida teens, 15 and 16, that were arrested for setting up a phony Facebook page that was X-rated several years ago.  They were charged with pasting the face of a school mate, whom they didn’t like, on a nude body and filled the page with foul language.  They thought it was a joke. They were charged with felony stalking.    


How about the young lady that committed suicide last year because she was bullied.  We must overcome our fears.  A blogger recently experienced cyber bullying with her daughter.  As a matter of fact her blog was down for most of a day because it was hacked. Bullying is real, and it wrecks havoc on families.  A teen in my neighborhood committed suicide a few years ago.  If we as a parents won’t face our fears, how do we encourage our children to face theirs?  


Here are a few suggestions on how to overcome the fear of the computer and how you can get involved to help stop cyber bullying:

  • If you don’t consider yourself to be technically savvy, take a class or better yet get your child to teach you.  They love showing off their computer skills.  
  • Ask questions about your child’s friends and what’s happening in their life.  Follow them on sites popular with teens and make sure you have access to their accounts.  
  • Ask other parents, aunts, uncles, sisters and brothers to stay involved with your children on-line.  We can’t monitor our children 24/7, but you can recruit family and friends to assist.  It takes a village to raise a child.    
  • Computer etiquette starts at home.  Have conversations with your child or children on what’s appropriate or inappropriate to put on-line.  If they’re minors, you’re in control and you need to let them know you’re ruling the roost.  They must follow rules that you have set for on-line activities.   
  • Discuss the consequences of cyber stalking and the legalities of posting inappropriate posts. It’s illegal and the consequences are certainly worth a conversation with your child. 

Do you see the importance of keeping up with your child?  Better yet stay in front of them so you can lead.  If you can’t stay in front of them stay beside them.  Taking a class is cheaper than paying a lawyer to get your child out of a felony for on-line harassment or other effects from bullying.  Would love to know your thoughts on this post and how you monitor your child’s on-line activities.    


You may also like:     15 Tips to Detect If Your Child Is Being Bullied

Photo compliments of www.stockvault.net