Did you watch the 2014 Emmys?  I love the Red Carpet.  I turn into the Fashion Police armed with handcuffs, a baton, patrol car and jailer.  I critique the dress, color, accessories, hair and shoes.   I’m prepared to handcuff the worst dresses and turn on the siren and lights for the best dresses.  I may apply for a job with Joan Rivers and Kelly Osbourne.  


At the top of my list is Halle Berry. My girl is rocking this gown.  Ba-Bam!  The color is soft and the design sexy.  Angelina Jolie take note, this is how a lady shows a little leg.  Your pose at the Oscars just doesn’t measure up.  Honestly, I couldn’t figure out if it was your leg or a stick. Your pose has been burned into my brain for months, but now I can say that it has been replaced. Halle is toned, the hair is flawless and accessories aren’t needed.  Although I wouldn’t complain about seeing her eye candy, Olivier Martinez, as an accessory.  That’s right ladies, I’m middle aged I’m not dead.  
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I love this color on Julia Louis-Dreyfus.  The gown was designed by Carolina Herrera.  It’s simple, but sexy.  Her dark hair is a beautiful contrast against the red.  Did you see the kiss with Bryan Cranston? It was so hot, I still have steam on my TV screen.    

Top Chef’s Padma Lakshmi looked beautiful in this white gown by Ralph Rucci.  It’s so plain, but less is more at times.  This was one of them.  Her dark hair and skin tone was all that was needed for this pose on the Red Carpet.  

Camila Alves, Matthew McConaughey’s wife, looks fabulicious in this white design by Zuhair Murah.  She is stunning and so is the gown.  What do you get when you have stunning + stunning, perfection. The most amazing thing about this gown, it’s a ready to wear.  

My last pick in the favorite category is Viola Davis’ electrifying cobalt blue number by Escada. Ravishing is what comes to mind.  It’s age appropriate, but the neckline allows it to be sexy.  The color is beautiful against her brown skin.  

Lets talk about my worst dress list.  Do you ever wonder how designers come up with their designs?  I have no idea what designer Giambattista Valli was thinking when this hot mess was designed and I have no idea what Lena Dunham of Girls was thinking when she agreed to wear it. There is nothing that I can say except lock both of them up.  This is why I bring the jailer!  

I’m picturing actress Sarah Paulson walking down Rodeo Drive yelling catch me if you can and some unknown designer runs up from behind her and shoves her into all of this netting.  She’s trapped, she has to wear it.  This can be the only logical explanation.  There’s room in the back of the police car for one more.  Off to lock up Sarah.   


What were your favorite and less favorite dresses of the 2014 Emmys?