8 Ways Leading Your Children By Example Can Shape Their Life


parenting tips

Do you believe in leading your children by example?  Setting a good example for my daughter and grandchildren is important to me.  I have always believed that I needed to be the mother that I wanted my daughter to be.

I never wanted to be the type of mother that says do as I say and not as I do.  How do you teach your children when you aren’t an example of what you want them to be or do?  So many things become generational. We have people who are unable to break the cycle of dysfunctional relationships and living.  They continue to struggle with dependency on drugs, alcohol, or the system in some manner. We all come from something, but that doesn’t mean that you have to continue down that path.  We all have the power to change our situation.

I believe that it is imperative to set an example for those whom I wish two inspire or lead.  Here are a few things that I have learned on my journey as a mother.  I have implemented them into my life, because I believe in leading your children by example:

  1. You must establish credibility – Seeing is believing. You don’t have to be perfect, but you must be honest and you must know that your children will be looking to you for guidance as well as looking at how you achieve your goals and how you provide for them.
  2. What makes you an authority? Let your children know that you’ve been in their shoes or a similar situation.  Tell them what you did to accomplish the goal or resolve the problem. It’s important that they know they’re not the only person experiencing a particular problem or situation and it can be overcome or the goal reached.
  3. Who wants to follow someone who is still struggling to get themselves together – You can’t lead with A Do As I Say and Not As I Do attitude.  You should be demonstrating how to improve yourself and move forward.
  4. You must be positive – Your child will respond to a positive attitude.  
  5. You must have good decision making skills and you must be disciplined – You need to teach your children how to make decisions and how to stick with the decision.
  6. Show your child that you can be successful personally as well as professionally –  If you’re struggling on a personal level continuously, it will be difficult to lead your children.  When I was raising my daughter I talked to her about my some of my personal struggles, but I did not burden her with my financial situation.  Running my household was my responsibility.  I did explain the importance of holding down a job and being reliable.  Goals should be a topic of discussion. My daughter understood that my job paid the mortgage, purchased food, clothing, and afforded her activities and our vacations.
  7. Demonstrate how to work toward financial goals Explain the importance of saving for a rainy day and the importance of paying yourself first.  Cry broke, but never be broke.
  8. Give your children a spiritual/religious foundation Teach them to say their prayers and bless their food. We all need to believe in someone or something greater than ourselves.
Finally, know that we’re all a work in progress.  However, we hold the future of our children in our hands.  So, “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.” – Proverbs 22:6.  We hope that our tips on leading your children by example has been beneficial, and you will strive to implement a few examples into their life.  You may also like:  6 Reasons Learning to Forgive is Good .



  1. @Sharon Hodge – Thanks for stopping by.  It is so true, that our children are always watching and listening, and I agree this is why it is so important for us to set a good example. 

  2. Those are great ways to lead by example.  We all know that children are watching you and picking up little things that you do.  Sometimes, they may not act like they are paying attention, but they are.  That's why it's very important to set good examples….

  3. Lots of wisdom here! I get frustrated when I see adults practicing the same uninvolved parenting style that they endured. The first thing I emphasized to my daughters when they became pregnant was that now it was THEIR turn to fix the mistakes I made bringing them up. I was really taken aback when the oldest replied, "And repeat the major successes you had!"

    • That's beautiful J.  That's a demonstration of what I'm saying, our children are always watching and listening.  We don't have to be perfect but we must be their example and want them to do better than us. Thanks for stopping by.