Handling Loneliness As a Single Parent

It’s time for us to let the cat out the bag.  None of us had a immaculate conception.  At some point we had sex that’s how we became mothers and father, right.  Hell some of us had great sex! No matter how strong we become as single parents, deep down we still want to have someone wrap their arms around us.  What’s wrong with being told that we’re beautiful, that we’re loved and that they want to make passion love to us.  It’s a healthy desire.

As single parents, we exert a huge amount of energy into raising our children.  Most of the responsibility of raising  children falls onto the parent who has legal custody.  Because it takes so much energy to raise our children alone, we place ourselves on the back burner.  As a result, we bury our need to be loved because loving our children becomes the priority.  But, at some point our feelings come roaring to the surface.

So, I’m encouraging all of you to say, I feel lonely at times.  Admit that you want someone to love. If you’re alone while reading this post, scream it!  Now I can’t guarantee that a handsome man will appear when you finish, but at least you’re acknowledging those deep down feelings. Talk about it with a friend.  You’re freeing yourself from the guilt of wanting to be with someone.  And, you’re freeing yourself from the pain of not being able to achieve it because of your status.

Furthermore, I worried about dating and having a strange man around my daughter when I was raising her.  The thought of someone molesting her that I was dating or another failed relationship haunted me. I had made mental notes of women who had placed a man before her children.  Or, trusted them around her children and the man ended up abusing them.  Being a single mother is hard enough, I simply couldn’t add that burden to my list of life’s troubles. I realized that I treasured my daughter more than I wanted a relationship.  When she got older, I would consider getting involved again.

How to Deal with Feeling Loneliness as a Single Parent:

• Accept that you deserve to have a little fun and need adult interaction.  Open yourself up to dating and or making new friends.
• Take a few college courses to better yourself.  First, attending class and doing homework will keep you busy to a point where you don’t have time to focus on being lonely.  Also, I also met great people in my classes and would meet them for a drink or burger after class.
• Reconnect with old friends, male and female.  Next, they may be receptive to spending time with you and your children.
• Compile a list of books that you want to read.  So, this can include self-improvement, romance, true crimes and anything else that catches your eye.
• Learn to cross-stitch, crochet, or scrapbook.  – Finding a hobby that you can do the week-end will help tremendously.  I started scrapbooking and crocheting.  I made scrapbooks for friends and Christmas gifts.
• Treat yourself on Saturday nights that you don’t have a date.  Burn a candles, put on some soothing music and soak in a hot tub.
• Check out on-line groups who can relate to your situation.  They are great source of inspiration, a great way to make friends and social networking for business endeavors.
• Take a sewing class or teach yourself to sew. – Last, learning to sew will help with the expense of purchasing new curtains, throw pillow, kid’s Halloween costumes and more.
• Have a spa day – Give yourself facials, paint your nails or soak in a hot, bubble bath.  It all helps to reduce stress.

Finally, know that you are not alone and you will eventually find love again.  Good things come to things who wait, but be sure to treat yourself well while you’re waiting. I hope you implement a few of my tips on dealing with loneliness as a single parent.  You may also like7 Ways Single Moms Cope With Loneliness.