Are you built on a solid foundation?  Recently, I had a conversation about being successful in relationships and in life.  I remembered a quote from many years ago, “If it’s not build on the right foundation it won’t stand.”  I always believed the quote was so fitting, especially when it pertains to relationships.   I started thinking about the many people that I’ve encountered over the course of the years.  Some of my relationships/friendships have withstood the test of time and some were temporary.  I know that those that didn’t last weren’t build on the right foundation, at least not for me.   Today, I’m going to share a few tips that will help empower you and teach you how to build confidence in your relationships.

I see my house, me, as having 3 major components. The first is my foundation. My foundation is what keeps me standing.  It’s what allows me to bend, but not break. It’s what allows me to be able to weather storms when they hit. My foundation is my values that I’ve worked to develop over the years.  My values change, but they have always allowed me to remain steadfast and not waiver.  These tips will teach you how to build confidence in your relationships:

• Assertive – I have learned to assert myself over the course of the years.  I’ve worked on speaking my mind, but doing it in a tactful way.
• Open-minded – I’ve learned to accept people for who they are. They may not think the way I do and they may not live their life the way I do, but I’ve learned to let people be people.  I don’t need to socialize, be friends or have a relationship with them.  People are going to be who they are and I just don’t expend time and energy trying to change one thing about them.  I don’t sleep with them nor do I depend on  them for my lively hood, so they can kick rocks.  I just remove myself and continue with my life.
• Faith – It’s important that I believe in someone other than myself and I never waiver from my Faith.
• Self-Reliance – Self-reliance is important to me and one that I don’t waiver from.  I want to be able to sustain me and mine, and never have to rely on other people to keep a roof over my head, feed, cloth or sustain me in anyway unless it’s my husband.  Since I don’t have one, I work to take care of me.  I have the ability to do just that, so why should I take advantage of other people to do what I can do for myself.  If I’m going to teach others to be self-reliant, I must practice what I preach.  This tip is imperative when thinking about how to build confidence.
• Honesty – Another value that I will not waiver on.  I believe that a person’s word is their bond.  If you can’t live up to your words, it falls into the same category as being unreliable. You can’t be trusted, so what’s the point.
• Diligence – Remain steadfast and never give up.  This attitude will lead to you achieving your goals and ultimately your success.
• Resourceful –  You must build resources in order to be successful.  In my opinion, you build resources so you can build comrade and create great things together or assist one another in reaching a common goal.
• Real – The only fake thing that I like is the gel coating on my nails.  Other than that, I’m real and will remain real for the rest of my life.  If you can’t be real, you can’t show people who you really are.  You can count on what I say, and you can count on it being the truth.  At least my truth.

My second level is my frame.  I’m robust!  I’m thick enough where I can’t be snapped.  Within my frame is my goals, my decision making skills, my education and training.  Basically, my repertoire. My skills for survival and success.  The lessons and skills that I use to raise and assist my family as well as mentor and lead others.  I work continuously to enhance these skills.  The world changes constantly, so it’s important that we all stay on our game.

Education is the key to success.  It doesn’t have to be a formal education, you can educate yourself through on-line courses.  Furthermore, I believe life is the greatest teacher.   There are many who have been successful without a college degree.  Additionally, you don’t have to have a 4 year degree to be successful either.   You can obtain an Associates and do great things in your life.  It’s all about your ability to seek and obtain.

Most importantly, my frame includes my personality and how I see the world.  My approach to life and my belief system.  I have set high standards for myself.  And, I work everyday to maintain what I have accomplished and continue to reach for what I haven’t.

Last is my frame out.  How I present myself, my frame and my values to the world.  You can acquire education and possess skills, but if you can’t put it together for the benefit of yourself, your family and make a contribution to society what good is it.  I’m thankful that I have worked toward everything that I have.  It empowers me to assist others in receiving theirs as well.   When you feel good about yourself, the sky is the limit.

How to build confidence in your relationships is something to ponder?  What is your foundation built on and what do you include in your frame out? Everyone doesn’t have to be built on the same foundation nor do we have to have the same frame or frame out.  That’s what makes us individuals.  Just make sure that your foundation is solid and it won’t crack when you encounter a storm.